10 November 2006

That's 'Docklands' with a C

A reminder of why I like Barry Humphries so much. There has recently been some salacious news that Melbourne's Docklands precinct is becoming “a centre for unlawful, high-end prostitution, with escorts charging up to $800 an hour for sex in luxury high-rise apartments. A representative of the legal brothel and escort industry said his group had evidence that ‘scores and scores’ of women were using apartments in the emerging suburb.”

Humphries muses, in a piece by Gabriella Coslovich in the The Age magazine:

They should turn it entirely into a red-light district. It is at the moment; it has a very high percentage of prostitutes. It should be totally devoted to vice; it would make it a centre. People would get out of the plane and say ‘Docklands’!

It should have neon lights. It should be like Wanchai in Hong Kong or that place in Bangkok, Patpong; or Pigalle in Paris!

Of course a name change would be in order. ’Docklands’ doesn’t sound interesting.

They could change the word ‘dock’; a consonant could be changed, just by moving it back in the alphabet, couldn’t they?

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